Tuesday, December 16, 2014
Monday, December 15, 2014
Surpassing the Past
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NEXT BLOG: Evolver. I'm going to try to finish up with these past posts by the end of this year. I have copied all of their content into my offline file structure at home and plan to feature them in an independent web site in the years to come. Covering the vast scope of the crimes against me has kept me busy these last four years, but I may be close to catching up with the past. Since my past works have been successful, albeit, in the hands of my detractors, I expect my new work to be equally successful in the hands of its author. This gives me something to look forward to and keeps me motivated to keep on fighting for my rightful place among artists and performers. As tortuous as this trip has been, I am strengthened by the knowledge that I am on the side of good, honored with the privilege of lifting the torch of good hope for all humanity. If I have to stay home for a while to complete these tasks, please remember that if my work is online, I am not incarcerated. To help you tell me apart from malicious impostors while I'm away, I've decided to keep my profile simple and will not be posting anything on MySpace. Instead I'll mark my return with a new live music video on my one YouTube account and remain until further notice with 'the devil I know', as a skeptical voter would say. Signing off, Vancouver Public Library, 7:27PM Pacific time |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Mike Myers: Character Assassin
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I was looking through some of my ORIGINAL character names last night and I noticed a pattern. I often like to extend my character names with a title: Life of Martin: Word Inventor, Henderson Mayfield: Hoot Snatcher, Sarra Supreem: Queen of the Streets, Dirk Longjohn: Ram of God, etc. It sparked a memory of another character I invented in when my first 'show' blog was in its most formative stages: Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery, a vague parody of James Bond. Just as my show first reappeared in 2011 in Diary of a Sad Man, it initially took shape in an earlier blog than 2007's The Show Must Continue, as kind of playful experiment. The precise year of Myers' movie premiere with Powers escapes me, but I know it predates Mean Girls. That erased account of mine dated back to the late 1990's. Myers scooped up these words when they were still online and the media fully supported him, hyping his new movie to the skies. In spite of this, I wouldn't underestimate Myers' ability to come up with original work. I'm sure he could have invented his own title. He took my words because they were popular and he wanted my popularity to add to his own. What was that movie about again? Stealing someone's 'mojo'? I wonder how he came up with that idea as a charming piece of my personality had been dislocated from its source and was being blazoned across the world to herald his movie debut. I recall being quite upset about this in early 2007, but then I posted Size and everyone started loving me. It's hard to hold onto old grudges when you just wrote a hit song and the world wants to thank you for it. Too bad he and his friends wouldn't even let me hang onto that. Myers' pen was the one to which most of SNL's work would fall, according to most sources. I alluded to this in my poem about Saturday Night Live cast members: The Cinnamon Gang. He knew his colleagues would be lost without him and may have counted on them to steal whole seasons of their content from me in his absence and bury his offense. Because the media only asks Myers why he's so funny and only asks me if I'm having a hard time finding work, the movie he spun from this character I invented was a huge success. No one connected it to my blog, even though the original words were still online when the movie was being hyped. This likely encouraged Tina Fey to spin her movie Mean Girls from another of my posts: Mean Little Bitches. People like Myers and Fey thought it was okay to build blockbuster movies out of my ideas and leave me in the cold, looking like a hack, because I'm a rock star. They must hate rock stars. And where are my groupies? Bashing me on Dateline? Where are my fans? Lining up to see one of their friends rip me off some more? Where's my jet? What stadium am I booked in this week? When asked about the source of his character, Myers cited his late father. If his late father is looking down on him from Heaven now, it must be with bitter disappointment. The people who owe me the most in this life are the ones who treated me the worst. Their lives were rich with love and all they ever gave me was hate. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Sunday, December 14, 2014
Merry Lucimas
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First of all, if there's anything more I can do to ruin Christmas for all the pricks who were involved with the theft of my Christmas music, I hope I can think of it. I don't think these asses should celebrate Christmas. I think they should wait for Satan's birthday and celebrate that. It's a 4.2 km round trip walk to this public library. If you multiply that by the 1,200 days I have spent here typing in blogs that were stolen from me in the last seven years, well... [Fire alarm. Back in a bit.] Well I'm back. And I just opened up a new MySpace account. Looks like a good place to post music videos, if I can figure out their cryptic layout. As for YouTube, well, that was a good place for Justin Bieber to post videos, but you all see what happened to my hit songs from posting them on YouTube. I hope the police are watching my posts closely. Here is what I will do over the next few months. First I'm going to add all the content from this blog into another outside account. And I want you police to check for omissions that may exist in my current text on Blogger. While I suppose it's not altogether proper for me to bash the Google boy on his own website, it is still illegal for him to tamper with my content. And if it turns out that my content has been tampered with, I want that Google boy beaten senseless and thrown into a prison cell with a unicorn. Why is the hateful creep who lives across from me and spends his whole day with his eyes glued to the hate broadcasts of the lying TV telling me I'm defeated? Oh, I forgot, I want to make people laugh and dance, so that means I'm fighting a war. Who told him I was defeated? Was it the same people who told you all that Saturday Night Live wrote my blogs and that the Crystalids wrote my songs? Yeah, you can trust them. There's nothing really significant to add to this account now. I'm sure I'm still short of perhaps a couple dozen sketches and maybe one or two more hit songs, but I'd rather share them on MySpace than on HisTube. Go ahead and celebrate your Christmas now, the same way you did with all those fraud bands and fucking psychopathic comedians by going out of your way to make me miserable. I'll just spend my Christmas alone. And better off for it. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Saturday, December 13, 2014
The Racket
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Now that you readers know that I have been posting my own original content all along, how can you stand to watch those creeps on TV ignore me? Their stars depended on my work for years. I've had at least a thousand scripts molested by their fraud. And for Christ's sake, stealing my poetry? Poetry is truth! Is nothing sacred in this cheap consumer culture? Why aren't my news stories broadcast on TV? The TV only thinks a story is news if they can make money from it, like when Dateline had my evidence sold to them by the Google boy who thinks he owns my destiny. Remember how much they talked about me when they profited from it and when I didn't get a cent from it? And here's another news story you probably won't be hearing on TV. CBC's George went to prison. That's what I heard - unless they were talking about George W Bush. CBC can't profit from stories about their trusted announcers going to prison so they don't consider it news. See how capitalism warps the truth? It turns living an honest life into a desperate struggle. Truth is only good for distorting, as far as broadcasters like NBC are concerned. Why do you think I wrote my ad about a self playing guitar, the Rocket? Gee, maybe it was because there were so many assholes stealing my songs from the internet at the time that I figured the whole music industry was full of shit. But NBC's SNL made sure you all took that for a meaningless gag on their fucking show. And how much did their sponsors pay them to mar my truth? Yes, there's big bucks in distorting and perverting truth in a capitalist culture. And I shudder to think of the impact on its citizens. The way I see it, if you submit to this kind of intellectual tyranny at the hands of incorrigible broadcasters, you're not living a full life. You're in a kind of stupor, just floating along all the way to your grave. And your last thought will be that you never once lived your life for real the whole time you were here. And that doesn't bode well for your time in eternity. Broadcasters don't care about any of the truly important things in life, such as truth, love, honor, and hard work. They just care about money. How did such criminality become an institution in a modern society that calls itself enlightened? |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Saturday Night Live Destroys Hope
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As the legitimate owner of my work, I stay alive to give the world hope. After what the networks did to me, I'm sure a lot of people expect me to kill myself. No one would love this more than the networks, who could then cash in my life story, with Nothing but Ashes playing in the background. What kind of a message are networks trying to send us by leaving shows that robbed whole seasons of their content from the internet on the air? All I can think is that they want us all to know that the only way to have their support for stardom is to suck the Devil's dick. In other words, they destroy hope. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Thursday, December 11, 2014
The Ugly Industry
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Can you imagine Tina Fey lounging by the pool with her laptop, scanning conveniently through my script index to find the contents she would use for her next show? Lying on her back, with a crack pipe hanging in her mouth, complaining that her arm was getting tired from all her mouse clicking, she would home in on brilliantly worded, original dialogues like Family Feudalism and The Convex Corrective Silkscreen Solution, and choose them for her show, where her trusting fans would mistake them for examples of her hard work and 'artistic' talent. And Tina had a partner in crime with that local CBC supported creep, whose violations of my copyright protected humor are nothing short of spastic. Too bad my internal beauty is so compelling that it can make such vile criminals look good. Yes, that is why they so desperately need to steal my beauty. Because they're so abominably ugly. And also because they are LAZY. These words didn't all just magically appear in this account on their own. I had to struggle to write them. I enjoy the challenge and probably devote more time to my music and humor than most people do to their paying jobs. That's why I deserve to be paid for my efforts. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
How Long Does It Take?
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In 2007 I witnessed several TV shows stealing my scripts and it forced me to create an index to help my readers see that I was being ripped off. When a production worker paid me a visit and made sure the TV was tuned into MAD TV for their illegal broadcast of my Tuesday Night Long sketch, she watched me closely and chuckled at the humor. I said nothing and resolved to see a lawyer at the first opportunity. That sent me to Ottawa, where I shared my ordeal with lawyers. I had the evidence and it should have been a very simple matter to sue them. But the lawyers told me that these shows were only parodying my work. And my brother Roger got me sent back to Vancouver by telling my parents that I was stealing TV scripts. Frustrated, I carried on with my solitary struggle, my daily posts growing more and more aggressive. I recall going to each page of my account that had been plagiarized by TV shows and staring in wonder at how no one else could see the crimes being committed against me. I felt totally hopeless. And I thought that if I could have so much evidence online and it still wasn't good enough for a lawyer, I had nothing to lose by erasing the damn thing and forgetting I ever wrote it. Funny how my lawyers could tell me that the TV was only parodying my work at the same time as my neighbors were accusing me of stealing it from the TV. Shouldn't a parody differ significantly from its source? And would my neighbors have been satisfied with me telling them that their favorite TV shows were parodying me? I think that legal firm might need to be investigated. There's something corrupt about their handling of this case. Now, you see the kind of attitude I have about the business and how skillful I am at presenting my case. What do you think the business would do if I erased all my work today? Disconnected from my supporters, I would be a wide open target for their lies and fraud. They would try to wipe me out. They would try to make everyone forget how I daily humiliated them by merely stating the truth. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Wednesday, December 10, 2014
The 2008 Shammy Awards
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It's time for the 2008 SHAMMY AWARDS, hosted by Jay Leno! (Wild cheering.) And here to present the award for best new artist is the lead singer of the Crystalids. His name is Dean but you all know him better as JESUS! (Wild cheering.) Take it away, Dean. The award for best new artist goes to (opening envelope and reading note) BEYONCE! (Wild cheering.) |
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| © 2007, 2014. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
As It Was
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My current indexes are almost identical to my indexes from 2007. I recall them well now. I had all the scripts indexed first, in order to help strengthen my position against TV shows who were already stealing my content when it was still online. And I was in the midst of filling in my statements index when that crazy panic seized me from being featured on a Dateline show that declared me guilty of fraud. It was such a nightmare because I didn't know what was going on at the time. If only I knew then what I know now. My reasons for wanting YouTube to show my views were to help smooth out my relations with the locals, who thought I was robbing their favorite TV shows, thanks to the TV stealing my scripts when they were still online. I needed YouTube to show my views so people here could see that I was popular online and that I wasn't lying about my claims of ownership. But I guess Google doesn't want artists to know when they are popular. They don't mind letting stardom chasers know when they are popular, but they simply refuse to let artists know this vital information. So my account is now pretty close to how it looked in late 2007. I had indexes and I had thousands of pages of ORIGINAL content. I also had a blog with a few full-length scripts called Making a Play for You and I had a DHTML tutorial for beginners. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Monday, December 8, 2014
Technical Note
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I'm going to move those links to my songs and poems a little closer to your fingertips now, with a new dropdown. You might have already noticed it in my scripts index. I guess this ability I have to organize my information helped a lot of crooks to plunder my work last time. I used to have a blog where I explained some of my DHTML scripts. I wonder who has it now. Why don't we trace some of my harshest DHTML critics? I really think that it is the content of the web page that determines its success more than its appearance. But HTML provides a good structure to let browsers quickly get to the page of their choice. My present content is roughly the same now as it was in my erased account. I'm not going to open a new blog called The High Brow Oligarchy, like I did before at this stage. Nor do I plan to open a blog called Making a Play for You. And I doubt I'll be starting a HTML discussion this time. I don't think I have room for it. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Sunday, December 7, 2014
The Bottom Feeder
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Announcer: Catch the thrill and suspense of high stakes investing on The Bottom Feeder. Bottom Feeder: I'm looking for the highest possible return. Investment Banker: Burlap is in. Bottom Feeder: Higher. Investment Banker: Giant Auto cut production costs by switching to a new alloy comprised of crushed eggshells. Bottom Feeder: Higher. Investment Banker: Blast Records just got their hands on a new hit song abandoned by its author. Bottom Feeder: Beautiful. |
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| © 2007, 2014. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Saturday, December 6, 2014
The Missing Links
| It looks like I lost a couple of new links to my scripts and statements with my last paste-over. I have these files backed up on my home computer and will restore any missing content over the next while. The only one I wanted back today was my first 'Remembrance of War' sketch, where former wartime adversaries ended up at each others throats after cheerfully sharing details of their wartime exploits in front of each other. That's a good one, but it's too hard to track down here. Anyway, if you can't find it in the index, you might still know its location. Or perhaps you downloaded it and don't even need my index. | ||||||||||
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Saturday Night Lifeboat Ethics
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I know why everyone thought, in spite of my bitter daily complaints about how lousy my life had become since I started sharing my work on the internet, that I was 'forced' offline in late 2007, rather than freely choosing to put a stop to the nightmare, myself. First of all, it was because they all tuned in to an illegal broadcast of Dateline in which I was found 'guilty of fraud' by a kangaroo court. On top of that, it is hard to convince the world that you are suffering when people like George Carlin take your complaints and use them to party on a stage. It gives others the impression that you're having fun. I guess that's why it's illegal to steal people's complaints and turn them into comedy material. Now, it's Saturday again, my NBC detractors' favorite day, and I hope I can spoil it for them by sharing the following fact. If we had to share a lifeboat with Saturday Night Live cast members and you were the only one who knew how to save us, they would kill you and let us all die just to stop you from surpassing their celebrity status with your hero status. How many of my scripts did they own up to taking again? A few? Do they mean a few hundred? Take a look through my posts from the week before last to see how many hundreds of counts of NBC fraud that I caught merely by browsing the web, looking for other programs. And when you're done that, look through my songs and try to find just one formerly shared song that wasn't scooped up by greasy frauds and sold to big labels behind my back, after the fashion of Tina Fey's favorite band, the Crystalids, who wanted to get their Saturday Night Live gig by throwing me in prison to be tortured for merely rewriting my own song in 2010. Good luck. |
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| © 2007, 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Friday, December 5, 2014
Backspacing Over My Legacy
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By the way, I'm not trying to win any awards for my presentation here. I'm struggling to defend myself against a vicious broadcast industry as I try not to lose all faith in humanity. I enjoy playing with web code, but I've noticed that my CSS code sometimes leaks through Blogger's markup code and changes the properties of my page titles. I also can't get very far at home with my advanced DHTML before my Mac mini turns CSS pages into text files that read like a web page. I really miss my old PC, which I would still have if the Crystalids hadn't gotten my sweet little adopted family to 'borrow it' from me so he could destroy it to cover his fraud trail. I was thinking last night of something I probably shared in the past: the early church's vision of the universe. The early church wanted their cannon to be structured around the belief that Earth is Hell, our only hope of salvation through Christ. I'm sure all they had to do was take a quick look around and see how people treat each other to come up with that one. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Thursday, December 4, 2014
The Color of Outrage
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Jan 2016: Switched to the color of orange a short time later. I've chosen violet as the active color for my statements links. When I think of how this business has abused me, I turn violet. (Jan 15, 2015: To make a more pleasant contrast with the active color of my scripts and songs links, I have opted instead to color my active statements links orange.) Mistakes are an important part of my learning process and I don't have a problem owning up to them. People who think they're perfect must be stupid because they think they already know everything and no one can teach them anything. Some of the jerks who've been complaining about my web code might be the same ones who stole my DHTML scripts in 2007 and told everyone it was their work, just like the assholes who stole my music, comedy, and autobiography. These useless tools think they should not have to struggle to gain knowledge or glory. They think they should just be able to copy and paste it right out of my original posts, none of which I have received a cent for, in spite of my thousands of hours of pure effort. Fools want you to think they are philosophers with my blogs and the broadcasting industry wants to help them. Untalented children want you to think they have the sophistication of an artist in his forties and the broadcasters want to help them. Lazy bums want you to think they work as hard as I do. And the broadcasters want you to believe them. Hateful monsters want you to think they love you with my music and comedy. And the broadcasting industry wants to support them so they can make more money for themselves and leave me destitute. The broadcasting industry supports vicious criminals. It bends over backwards to help criminals destroy my work and my life. Now, why don't you go turn on your TV so they can make some more money? |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Wednesday, December 3, 2014
Up to Code
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My code is almost as developed as it was when I erased my blogger account in 2007. My reconstructed indexes must look eerily familiar to a lot of my followers. I like the appearance of a radiation leak caused by my latest rollover effect, so I'll be laboring to extend it throughout my blogs for the next while. Or perhaps I'll leave my old pages as they are and let my more developed pages show my evolution over the last five years. |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
A HTML of a Time
| I need to develop my HTML a little better now if I want to stay organized. So my new posts might slow down for a month or so. Sorry about those errors in my lyrics index. I think I got them all corrected today | ||||||||||
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Monday, December 1, 2014
Miracles of Science
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Hello and welcome to Miracles of Science. We're here with Simon One, the first boy to be born of a baboon. What's it like to be so famous? Horrible. My classmates are merciless. Don't the girls like you? Oh yeah. One of them offered me the banana from her lunch the other day. Don't you like the extra attention of being a star? I think you should put me on display in a zoo and get it over with. That's not very considerate of the mad scientist who lovingly created you in his laboratory. Yes, what is is name? My lawyer wants to know. I'm quite sure it isn't numerical like the one he gave me. Apparently you are quite a gifted gymnast. Does athletic prowess run in your family? You're joking, right? |
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| © 2007, 2014. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Sunday, November 30, 2014
Don't Be a Unit
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Funny how corporations think they own you through their media but the only way they could win your trust through the war and the writer's strike was to plunder and loot the erased posts of a man who objects profoundly to them. If they don't need my talent, as they are now presuming, why couldn't they keep their paws off of my property? Should we be mourning for the poor TV stars now? How about Jon Stewart? Should we all pity poor Jon for what happened to his show? I thought I was Jon Stewart. That's what everyone kept calling me for years. Should we pity the poor, disgraced Rolling Stones? I thought it was my funeral when I rewrote those words in 2013 and posted them online. Oh yes, and when a limousine pulls up and parks itself in a showy location at your workplace, you can believe everything its occupant says about me. It was rich people who stole my work, so I guess that means that if I'm not rich, I'm the criminal... Wait a minute... |
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| © 2014. Statements by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
Saturday, November 29, 2014
The Olympian Submersible Taskmaster
| Are undone chores spoiling your procrastinating trips to the tub? Do you wish for a device that could do everything for you while you recline in hedonistic sloth? Maybe you need the amazing new Olympian submersible taskmaster. Fashioned elegantly into an olive wreath for head wear, the Olympian is composed of a highly conductive copper alloy. Just put it on, plug it in, and let it drown all your worries in a nice hot bath. The new Olympian submersible taskmaster: feel the power. | ||||||||||
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| © 2007, 2014. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved. |
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